Second Child Syndrome

On Sunday we had the most incredible day celebrating our gorgeous little Alex as we held her christening.

For me, the biggest surprise was just how emotional I was on the morning. Perhaps because we went back to the church where we were married and had Thea christened too, or perhaps because in the lead up to Alex’s christening I’ve been doing a lot of reflecting on what it means to be a mum of two.

Now I myself am a second child so I know that we are just as loved, just as cared for and so on…..I actually happen to love being the youngest although sometimes my sister might disagree on the situation!!

Either way, since being a Mum of two I have realised just how hard it is to equally spread your focus all the time. And because one of my two children is already a toddler and enjoys all the dangers that life has to offer (including choosing the tallest slide at the park, and at the moment a particular penchant for jumping off of things), unfortunately sometimes our smallest Blackburn doesn’t get quite so much attention.

When the vicar suggested that someone do a reading at her christening, my husband and I had a good old look through Pinterest etc to see if we could get any inspiration. There were some lovely readings but none that I could find that really explained just how I have felt since Alex arrived. And so I wrote her a poem, a poem which one day I hope she will really enjoy reading and realise just how very special she is.

Are you a second child, or even third or fourth? Do you like being a younger sibling or would you like to be the oldest? Do you think you parent your children differently after the first? To read my poem to Alex, please scroll down.


To Our Second

 Our darling girl, here we are,

In just 9 months we’ve come so far.

Whilst you aren’t our first it’s true,

We can’t remember our lives before you.

Yes we may not take quite as many pictures,

And yes, your baby book’s less full than your sister’s.

But Alex, dear Alex, if only you could know,

How much you’re loved each second you grow.

Your milestones, your first steps, we may well miss;

Your hands, your toes, not quite so often kiss,

And sometimes, just sometimes, we may not be there,

As soon as you’re sad, but I promise we care.

For the truth of the matter dear Alex is this,

You’re second on one hand, you’re Thea’s little sis.

And yet, please remember oh small little one,

That after you there may well be none.

For whilst Thea came first, it was you who came after,

Our hearts are now full with love and with laughter.

With Thea, we couldn’t wait for it all,

But with you, these things we have tried to stall.

This doesn’t mean that we love you less,

In fact the feeling is much more complex.

When Thea stood I felt such pride,

When you stood up, I think I cried!

I cried that you were already growing up,

And mourned the day when you drank from a cup.

But the biggest feeling you leave me with inside,

Is one of complete joy and absolute pride.

So darling Alex, please enjoy your day!

We’ll try to make sure Thea doesn’t always have her way.

But more than anything, on this day know

That the three of us love you more than we could ever show.

In the words of Pooh, my favourite bear,

You don’t spell love, you can just feel that its there.

And if there ever comes a day when we can’t be together,

Just keep us in your heart and we’ll stay there forever.


Published by

Monkey & Pal

A languages teacher who became a mum for the first time in April 2015, and for the second time in September 2017. Danni lives with her wonderful husband, two beautiful girls and a rather cool cat. She loves reading, watching films and spending time with my family and friends. After blogging as Totally Mum, Totally Me for a year, Danni is really excited to launch Monkey & Pal

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